New York City
 NYC
It's only been...I lost track of time. I saw you and you saw me. I felt you and you felt me. No one understands what happened to me. I've been holding my breath ever since. Why didn't you stop me. I didn't mean to run. I've been beaten and tortured my whole life. They blame me. I barely made it out alive. Blood tears come streaming down my cheeks every night. I am always clawing my way out of something. Banging my head against the concrete wall until I break it. Begging for mercy and I get none. Always in the wrong place at the wrong time. Trapped in the wrong life. Screaming for you. But you don't hear me. The pain is so deep. They say some people are just unlucky, despite how hard that they try. Yeah, I'm so strong it's scary. Pain tolerance is sky high. Never enough for this nightmare train ride. I was not raised for this kind of life. I'm just a girl, walking home alone, every single night. You caught me off guard. I wasn't prepared. My guard was up so high. Impenetrable heights. I'm sorry I make it so hard. Did you forget about me. Because I dream of you every night. Because, you see, I'm all alone in this world. I don't have a family. They're dead to me. I crossed to the other side. And I've got so much love and nowhere to put it. I just want to put it in you my dear. Can you handle it? Am I too much for you? For everyone. Dropped out of the sky, like an alien, and into your life. It was my only chance at a better life. Forgive me. And come back into my life until the end of time. Because I won't make it otherwise. I'm always hanging by a thread. Walking on extra thin black ice. And I'm so angry. I'm lashing out. I'm getting mean. I'm not eating. There's a slasher loose on these New York streets and I'm praying he comes for me. Just so I don't have to cry for another excruciating night. I wish I could survive and thrive without the feeling you give me, but that's not reality. You're stuck in me. And I'll be here waiting for you, until I die.
Posted: Monday. July 03, 2023.
 
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